One Step Beyond
by AbyssQueen
Summary: This tells the story of Beyond Birthday, & how he became the BB we all know & love. There will be some lyrics from Just to Get High by Nickelback every once in a while, & not necessarily in order. Dates are based on the anime timeline.
1. Prologue, We Start with the End

**EDIT: Hey guys! Because of my major WB, I thought it might help if I reread this whole thing, & I saw a bunch of stuff I didn't like, so I'm making some minor edits to most/all of the chapters. Hopefully a new one will be up shortly!**

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><p>~<br>_He was my best friend_  
><em>I tried to help him<em>  
><em>But he traded everything<em>  
><em>For suffering<em>  
><em>And found himself alone<br>_~_  
><em>

"You've really messed up this time, B." L said, staring into a pale figure's black eyes from outside the jail cell. The young man looked very similar to L, though he wasn't a carbon copy. He wasn't quite as pale as L, the shape of his face was slightly different, the bags under his eyes not quite as thick, his hair not as long; subtle differences, and he was obviously five or so years younger. He was also covered in third degree burns, but the resemblance was there in the eyes and messy black hair. He didn't reply, just sat there, glaring at the man who had brought him to this place.

L sighed, turning and getting up to leave. "I'm sorry it had to end like this," he said, glancing back over his shoulder. When the young man still didn't reply, he turned back and walked out the door, regret clear on his face.

And in the young man's brain, there was a number stamped over L's head; _050321._


	2. Ch 1, Copier of Justice

**EDIT: Yo. ;)**

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><p>"What's this?" L asked, looking down at the young boy in front of him. The boy was about ten, wearing a white shirt and jeans, had dark smudges under his eyes, and he had fixed his black hair into a messy style.<p>

"I wanted to look like you." The boy said happily, looking up at his mentor.

"He's been dressing like this since you left last time," an old man said to L in explanation.

L shook his head slowly, as if in disbelief. "Well then…" He hadn't expected this at all. There were few students currently at Wammy House, all orphans that were in training to become L's successor. The first in line was A, but B was also being trained, in case of A's death, and so on, but only A and B were being mentored by L personally. He had never expected one of them to attempt to be this much like him, and a smile crept across his normally expressionless face. "Well then, this will be interesting, won't it, B?"

Beyond nodded and ran over to a table set with two chairs. He sat down in one, pulling his knees up to his chest.

"You're sitting like me too?" L was honestly surprised; not an emotion he felt often. Beyond nodded proudly, and L mused. "Okay, time to start. Let's say… You've cornered your suspect," L said, jumping into a role play, "And he is clever. More clever than anyone you've ever met before. He has left behind no evidence, but you know he is guilty. What do you do?"

B thought for just a second, before replying, "Try to get him to say something only the one guilty of the crime would know?"

L smiled rewardingly. "Yes! But what if he doesn't say anything of use?"

At that, B actually needed to think. "Hm… I don't know… Maybe you could make up some fake evidence and show it to him. Maybe he'll respond with something like 'I never did that!'?"

"Hm. Possibly, but there's a chance that this person has thought that kind of thing through. He knows you'll be trying to get him to say something that would incriminate him. What then?"

"Well… what if you revealed yourself? Like, if you said something like "I'm L", but-"

"But what if he killed you right there and then?"

"Well… Then you'd be dead." B frowned. Seemingly from out of nowhere he pulled a jar of strawberry jam, and popped off the lid, scooping the jam out with his hands. L smiled; it was humorous, watching Beyond eat his jam, but he really needed to work on being less messy. But for the moment, he would ignore Beyond's sticky hands.

"Well, the object is to not be dead."

B frowned again, licking the jam off his fingers. "So… what if you put him in a situation where he had to kill someone or die? Only, you wouldn't actually kill him. You could have, say, someone put a gun to his head or something. Only it would be a blank. You could make up a real-sounding story depending on the situation, and if he didn't kill the person, he's innocent. If he does, he's guilty."

"But what about the person that would be killed?"

"Well, maybe he could be a criminal? Someone already on death row? And if he didn't die, you'd let him go?"

L smiled. "That's better. Yes, that could work in some situations, maybe sixty-percent. Let's try another one. Let's say…"

And so the lesson continued. It seemed that the first situation had only been a warm up, and that they got harder as the teachings went on. L never just gave him the answer, only guided or steered B toward it. By the end of it, Beyond's brain hurt, and he had gone through several jars of jam. B had also been careful not to stare at what was above L's head; a number- _11052007,_ and a name-_ L Lawliet._ If he ever told anyone that he could see these things, he'd be called crazy. Which he had. Apparently, only he could see these things. He had used to read off the names and numbers of the people he passed on the streets when he was with his parents. At times, they would laugh and mess up his hair. At others, his father told him to stop it, that it was unnatural. Occasionally his mother would talk to him about it, telling him it would go away eventually, that she had seen them too, before she had him. But all that was before the accident. Until then, he hadn't known what those numbers were. He had known what the names were, and since both his mother and father had the same numbers, he just figured it was something that ran in the family. But on that day, when he was still just five, he had found out. The doctor at the hospital had said something about a train, and that it had been too late. He had been there, when they had died, when the numbers had vanished. He had cried and cried, not paying any attention to anything that happened afterward, except for one detail that he had managed to pick up on. As someone was leading him away from his dead parents, he saw the doctor writing on a piece of paper; _'Date of Death: 05-12-1992'._ He recognized it; the numbers that had been floating above his mother and father's heads.

Since then, he had gotten used to knowing when people were going to die. It became just another part of life, same as eating and sleeping. He had made himself feel no emotion when he saw someone with just a year left, or a month, or a day. Half the time he didn't even care to let the numbers register as dates in his head. Five years later, he was at Wammy's House, which was interesting and boring at the same time. At any rate, it was tiring.

. . .

After his lesson, Beyond ran to go get 'A', who had had her lesson just before his. Knocking on the door to her room, he called out. "Aislinn? Come on out, Ash!"

A girl opened the door. She was about the same age as B, maybe a year younger, with stick straight black hair. She was wearing jeans with the knees worn out from use, and a red hoodie, looking much like Little Red Riding Hood. As Beyond looked into her happy brown eyes, he couldn't help but see the name and date. _Ashley Kehr. 03131998._ He couldn't help but wonder why everyone at Wammy House didn't use their real names as he and L did. Or rather, he knew why one might do that- to keep one's identity hidden, which was a good safety precaution in the case of those at Wammy's, but even L himself was on first-name basis with the entire world. Of course, L and Beyond aren't your average names... But that wasn't what mattered; what mattered was that Ash only had a year to live.

This one date saddened B though no others did. He hadn't given thought to the dates hanging over anyone else's heads; either they were many years from now or he didn't care enough about that person to think it mattered. But that one date, March 13, 1998, bothered him deeply. He couldn't tell anyone about it, not even Ash herself, or L, or Watari; the owner of the orphanage. So Beyond had vowed that he would be there when it happened. That if possible, he would stop her death. Could he change the dates? By simply being there, could he change the day that Ash met with Death? Or would her death be caused by him?

Perhaps these thoughts were far too aged for someone of just ten years, but B had lived with death around him his entire life. He was decided; he would protect Ash, if it was literally the last thing he did.

Ash's voice interrupted his train of thought. "B? Stop staring like that; it's creepy," she giggled.

B smiled, stepping out of the doorway to let A through. Together they ran down the stairs, racing, to see L one last time before he left again. L's visits were far too short and far too in between, and both Beyond and Ash enjoyed seeing their 'father', as he had become to them. It may have been just another of L's identities, but it was one he enjoyed.

"I should be able to come back next weekend," L said, crouching to Beyond and Ash's level.

"So soon?" Ash's face lit up. L nodded, smiling, and ruffled B's hair.

"You need to grow it out some to look like me," he joked, though it was true; Beyond's hair wasn't long enough to match L's hairstyle.

And with that, L left, if only for the time being. He had cases to get back to; a job that wouldn't, couldn't, let him rest. Justice never slept.


	3. Ch 2, Say Grace, And She Won't Shut Up

**EDIT: Yo. This has been edited X3 I also combined this chapter and what was the next. YAY!**

**A/N: I've decided to start writing Author's Notes! :3**

**...Mainly to warn you that this chapter is basically half a mid-story one-shot for a RL friend (chu happy, Jackie-chan Dryer-kun?) & half filler. Because RL "Grace" comes up with random things for her character, and I'm too damn lazy to write her a oneshot. Lengthens the story anyway. xD Dx**

**However, the the following chapter does serve a purpose! It introduces you to OCs that may or may not be important in dah FUTURE! And they let you see a bit of (average?) life at Wammy's ;)**

**I'm also trying to practice making... strange occurrences... seem natural. It's useful when you're writing anime fanfictions. XD**

**Thanks to all who have read & reviewed! It means a lot x3**

**p.s. like the title? XD**

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><p>"Your book reports are due today," the female teacher at the head of the classroom announced, though everyone already knew. "Who would like to go first?"<p>

G's, or Grace's, hand shot up immediately. "Me! Oh, me Mrs. Ren! Over here! Me!"

After a few seconds of silence, no one else had volunteered, and Mrs. Ren sighed. "Fine, Grace, go ahead."

The girl stood up. She was about eleven; the only other kid in the class that was B's & Ash's age. She had unusual emerald green eyes, and long blonde hair that was currently fixed into a bun, with her bangs free.

"I did my report on War and Peace!" she said excitedly, skipping to the front of the classroom. "Well, first off, I'd like to say that it was a REALLY fast read. It only took me, like, two days to read it! But it was really boring..."

"Just get on with it…" Mrs. Ren said, despairing at the thoughts of what might be to come.

"Well, it starts out with this random quote, and it's like 'Well, Prince,-' AND OMG I love princes!" she interrupted herself, -"'so Genoa and Lucca are now just family estates of the Buonapartes.-' oh yeah, this book has, like, REALLY weird names. -'But I warn you, if you don't tell me that this means war, if you still try to defend the infamies and horrors perpetrated by that Antichrist- I really believe he is Antichrist- I will have nothing more to do with out and you are no longer my friend, no longer my 'faithful slave',-' I think we all know what that means," she grinned impishly, -"'as you call yourself! But how do you do?-' I'm fine, thanks! -'I see I have frightened you- sit down and tell me all the news.'

"It was July, eight-teen 'o five,-' which, is like, the BEST time ever! I don't know why but I just love that time! –'and the speaker was the well known Anna-' Oh! Ilovethatname! If I could change my name, I'd cha-"

"Grace," Mrs. Ren interrupted, "Is your entire report just you reciting War and Peace with your own commentary?"

"Well… Yeah! Did I get an A?"

"…What's the sixth word on the two-hundred thirty-second page?"

"Received!" said Grace immediately. "Can I have my A now?"

Mrs. Ren shuffled through her copy of the book, which was the same as the one she had loaned to Grace, and came to the two-hundred thirty-second page. She stared at it for a second in silence, then decided to test the child again. "…And what about the twenty-third on the five-hundred sixty-fourth page?"

"There."

"AHA! And that's where you're wro-" Mrs. Ren was cut off when she flipped to the page and realized that Grace had said the correct word.

"Can I have an A now?"

"…Sure, whatever… I don't even…." Mrs. Ren said dismissively. She sat down, her hand to her forehead. Figures, one of the smartest kids in the class was a total ditz. "Daniel? Would you like to share your report?" she said, deciding that from now on she'd choose who would go next.

'D' nodded and walked to the front of the class, giving his report on one of the Sherlock Holmes novels. Meanwhile, B wasn't paying much attention. He was lost in his own thoughts when Grace flicked a note onto his desk.

"…Hm?" he mumbled, unfolding the note. It read something very simple- _'Hi! :D'_

Beyond groaned, knowing if he didn't reply, he'd get a pencil to the eye, and knowing that if he did, the conversation would carry on forever. He hid the note from sight as he wrote his response, trying to seem cheerful while keeping the conversation as boring as possible; hoping she'd give up, but knowing she wouldn't. _'Hey! :) How do you memorize stuff like that?'_Flicking it back over the aisle, he pretended to be paying attention to D's report, though he could care less; he'd read the book at least ten times.

The reply hit him just above the ear. He cast a slight glare at Grace, and she grinned innocently, mouthing a _'Sorry.'_ He unfolded the paper, giving it just a glance. He had a somewhat genuine interest in how she did so, but her response hadn't helped at all; _'Idk, it just happens that way! :D'_

He sighed again, thankful when Mrs. Ren called him up to do his report on _The Dark Tower_ series by Stephen King. It was short, and to the point, and he could tell Mrs. Ren approved. He was a bit of a 'teacher's pet', though not by choice. He couldn't help it if the teachers liked him, annoying as it might be.

. . .

A month later, Beyond was making his way up the stairs to his room. He was in trouble; teasing the new arrivals. There had been a lot of them lately, and they were quickly advancing among the ranks of the Wammy's House children, even with how young they were. First to come was a young boy, only about three, with red-brown hair and emerald eyes. Next was another boy, a blond, about two years older than the first, and a red headed girl about the same. The two came in together, from Russia or something of the like; Beyond didn't particularly care to remember. Then there was an eight-year-old; tall and _loud. _The last to come so far was a four-year old most-likely-albino; small for his age and extremely quiet.

B hadn't _really_ done anything wrong; just a little teasing, just having some fun by poking some fun. Nothing physical. And yet he was grounded to his room. He kicked a step as he made his way up, venting his frustration at Roger's unfair judgment. Sure, it wasn't his first offense recently, but…

The raven-head trudged toward his room, not bothering to watch where he was going.

Mistake.

He hit the floor with a loud thump, and a swear he was sure he wasn't supposed to know.

Picking himself up off the floor, he looked behind him to see what he had stumbled over. He was surprised to see a pair of odd-looking shoes in the middle of the hallway. They looked brand new, and were mostly tan in color, with a cross-stitch or plaid sort of pattern, with an 'S' shape connecting the corners. From the top to the front of the toes on either side were black stripes with a red stripe in between. They had dark brown laces, and a leather strap stretched from the front of the shoe around the back to circle the ankle. He picked the pair up, turning one shoe around to see the back. On the black heel of the shoes was a word in cursive red; _Gucci._

"Goosey? Guki? What the hell's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh… My… God…" came a high-pitched voice from up the hall.

"Huh?" Beyond looked up, seeing Grace run over and stop in front of him, an excited but almost panicked look on her face.

"Are those… Are those… Gucci?"

"Um… I guess…" Beyond responded, more than lost.

"Can I… Can I touch them?"

"…Sure…"

Grace tentatively stretched out her hand, daring herself to just touch the shoe. When at last she did, she almost fainted.

Beyond didn't get why it was so amazing. It. was. a shoe. Nothing more. Right?

"Can I… You think I could have them?"

"I don't see why not… I have no idea who they belong too…"

Grace squealed, grabbing the shoes and running towards her room. Beyond followed more slowly, sneaking a peak into the girl's room.

They were everywhere.

On her bed, on the floor, in her closet (the door was jammed open by several pairs.)

Everywhere.

Shoes.

. . .

After class one day, and a seemingly endless and certainly half-hearted argument with Grace over which was better, Coke or Pepsi, B rushed away as fast as possible. He liked Grace, he really did, but sometimes… Sometimes Grace was Grace, and Grace was talkative. Very. Didn't even matter what she was talking about, she could carry on forever. And she couldn't talk without her hands. If you tied her hands behind her back, she wouldn't be able to speak a word. He smiled for a second, musing at the thought, then he shot off down the halls, ducking around and under other kids; racing toward A's English class. It was the only class they didn't have together, and it was at the end of the day.

"Hey Ash!" he grinned, as always ignoring the ominous date literally hanging above her head.

"Hey Bee-Bee!" she called out, using her new-found nickname for the boy, and the two raven-heads ran off together to re-find Grace and a few others their age for a game of soccer.

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><p><strong>AN: YAY, CUTE 'LIL ENDING :P**

**For those of you who may or may not be wondering, BB likes Coke. Because Coke is awesome like that :D**

**& BTW, don't worry about the redhead that came with Mels, she's foreshadowing for another fic of mine. & the random brown-haired-person is... a random brown-haired-person XD**


	4. Ch 3, It Begins as a Plan

**EDIT: Yayyyyy... last chappie ish fixed X3 **

**A/N: DOUBLE-UPDATE! BOO-YAH! This is my 3rd chappie in 2 days, I think :3**

**IS THAT-? COULD IT BE-? IT'S THE PLOT! :O Finally! BB's up to his tricks! :D**

**I need to complain though... IT IS EXTREMELY HARD TO WRITE LITTLE KID MELLO. Why? Because you're all like 'well he's 5 years old he's gonna be cute & innocent &- WAIT WTF THAT'S NOT MELLO AT ALL DDDX'**

**'Tis frustratin'.**

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><p>~<em><br>I watched the lying_  
><em>Turn into hiding,<em>  
><em>With scars on both his lips,<em>  
><em>His fingertips<em>  
><em>Were melted to the bone<br>_~

Several months later, Beyond glared boredly out the window, busy not-listening to L's lecture.

"B, you can't just break Near's robots like that. He's just a little kid; he didn't know he was interrupting your studies."

_Studies my ass…I was looking for something fun to do,_ thought Beyond, though he didn't say so aloud. He had been bored as of late; life at Wammy's was utterly without excitement, just the same thing over and over; study and learn, solve completely unchallenging "puzzles" and made-up cases. It was boring, and the ten year old boy was restless. He had thought many times about running away, but one thing kept him here; his worry for Ash. Only five months until her death date, and he still wanted to be there to protect her then. He had asked her to run away with him, but she had refused, stating that she liked it here. _I don't know how she, or anyone else here, can stand this…_ How could everyone else seem so content with this life, always stuck on repeat?

Looking up at his mentor, he was suddenly through with hearing his voice. He got up while L was still mid-sentence, and left the room, heading up the stairs to his room, which he now shared with a terribly annoying boy and his wide collection of robots, Lego's, dice, and other toys.

The boy was sitting there, making _whoosh_ing sounds and pretending to make a robot fly. Beyond rolled his eyes and sat on his bed, pulling the knife he had hid under his bed out and admiring its sharpness. Quietly, he pricked his finger, grinning and smiling as slowly blood dripped from the shallow wound. Careful to not draw the attention of Near, he painted his face with it, making himself look like a younger but bleeding L.

Yes, even as little as he liked L now, he still dressed like him and shared his mannerisms. It had become habit, and it was fun to pretend to be a bleeding image of his mentor.

B was grinning profusely when he heard a knock on the door. Near ran to go get it, and Beyond frantically washed off his face and covered up his still bleeding finger.

"Get outta the way, stupid," came a voice from the doorway. It was slightly hostile, but there was no true hate. Near dismissed the words but backed off, going back to his robots as if nothing had happened, and a boy dressed in all black walked into the room. He was roughly a year and a half older than Near, and had shoulder-length, blond, almost orangeish hair, blue eyes. He was about five, half the age of Beyond, but he looked up to the older boy and followed him around whenever he could. But he wasn't at all annoying. No, the boy was actually a good companion, even though he was so much younger.

"Hey Mello," B grinned.

"Hey B!" Mello said, almost happily. He glanced at the hand Beyond was hiding behind his back. "Whatcha doin'?" he asked.

Beyond grinned even wider, showing Mello the knife, careful to keep it hidden from Near. He didn't mind telling Mello; he would never tell anyone, and he seemed to be fascinated by the sharp objects B hid at times.

Mello's eyes widened with curiosity, and the young boy reached out his hand in question, reaching for the knife. In response, Beyond smirked & handed Mello the weapon.

"Careful; it's sharp," he sneered, voice still hushed.

"Where did you get it?" the blond whispered.

"The kitchen, where else would this damn place have knives?" B responded, as if it was obvious. Which, it kinda was, but at the same time, it wasn't. The blond boy stared in awe, admiring the reflection of light on the sharp blade.

"Whattayou gonna do with it?"

"I don't know. Nothing yet, but I'm coming up with a plan."

"Can I come?" asked the blond immediately, eager to come on whatever adventure this would turn into.

"Maybe," said Beyond, not sure if it was a good idea for the five year old to come on this 'adventure' or not.

Mello was about to press, but Beyond interrupted before he could say anything. As Near got up and left the room, presumably to ask Roger for more Legos, B pulled a small box, about only an inch by inch in size, from out from under his pillow. Flipping open the lid, he pulled out a small stick with a red tip. "Want to see something cool?"

The young Mello nodded, eyes wide once again. Beyond struck the match against the top of the box and held it out in front of him, eyes glowing like the fire that had appeared from seemingly out of nowhere. Mello gasped, but didn't reach for the match. Within a few seconds, the faint light went out, and B stuffed the matchbox back under his pillow.

"Pretty, ain't it?" B sneered, glancing away from the wide-eyed blond for a second to check the door. Quieter now, he whispered; "I'm sneaking out tonight. I'll be back, but don't tell anyone. Got it?"

The five year old nodded in understanding, but didn't say a word. Quietly, B ushered him out the door. It was almost curfew, and after that no one would be out in the halls. It would be easy to sneak out.


	5. Ch 4, Gasoline

**EDIT: Hayyyyyyy... while Tawneh's being mentioned, why don't you check out our joint account TheTawnyColoredAbyssOfDoom for some crackfic goodness? :) **

**A/N: I'd like to thank Tawnyshine, who's my FF idol btw (read her stuff, she's amazing!), for helping me with the drunks' speech !**

**Oh, was that a spoiler? ;)**

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><p>It was about eleven thirty when Beyond opened the door to the hall. Most kids would be asleep now, save a few night owls and maybe some older teens, but he wasn't worried about them. There were no cameras in the House either, a rule which L had grudgingly agreed to. Roger would be in his room, and L and Watari had already left for L's current hideout.<p>

It was the perfect opportunity.

Carrying his shoes, B ran swiftly and quietly on the balls of his feet toward the stairway, knowing that as long as his heels didn't touch the ground, he could minimize the sound of his escape. He tiptoed down the stairs, wincing once as a single _creeeeaaaak_ broke the silence for less than a second. Beyond froze, but when he detected no signs of anyone or anything stirring, he continued on his way.

Through the main hall and to the door B ran, constantly on guard and aware. He cracked the door open a few inches and slipped outside, immediately putting the shoes on his sockless feet. He sped across the yard, veering to the right towards the gap in the tall bushes surrounding the orphanage he knew was there. He dived into the hole, immediately taking in and noting everything he saw.

But what he didn't notice was a black box with a small red light poking out of the bushes.

. . .

_"L?" _came an automated voice over the computer. L looked up from the case file he was reading.

"Yes, Watari?"

_"It appears that one of the students has snuck out."_

"Which one?"

_"Backup."_

L grimaced. "I'd really prefer you didn't call him that… Which way did he go?"

_"Toward town."_

"I see… Inform Roger but tell him to act as if nothing has happened."

_"Sir?"_

"Just do it. I'll take action if I deem it necessary." _What are you up too, B?_

. . .

Beyond glanced behind him, smirking. _That was too easy… It makes me suspicious… The only thing that keeps me from questioning it is the knowledge that Roger convinced you to allow limited security, L._ B made his way around the outskirts of Winchester, glancing around his surroundings every few seconds. He may know that security at Wammy's was limited, but that didn't keep him from being cautious. He kept to the alleys and such, mapping the city in his head so he would know where he was next time, and the easiest way back.

Hearing some scuffling and laughing ahead, B ducked behind a crate, noting that it smelled thickly of liquor. The sound got closer until he could see seven extra shadows draping over the brick walls. They stumbled along, as if drunk, and Beyond didn't dismiss the possibility.

Shivering in the cold night air, B ducked further behind the crate as the shadows' owners rounded the corner. They kept walking toward him, and the stench of alcohol grew stronger with every stumbling step they took. He held his breath as they passed by him, scared. Sure, he had wanted a little excitement, but he didn't want to be killed. Farther ahead of him now, he heard a sound like glass breaking, and more laughter.

_Are they… robbing a store?_ Curiosity got the best of him, and he ran out from behind his hiding spot, chancing a peek around the corner.

Two of the men, both extremely tall, were standing outside; presumably guards, and Beyond could hear loud crashing from inside the store. _How come this isn't waking anyone up?_ he wondered. He took another step forward, and, not seeing the beer bottle one of the guys had dropped a he passed, struggled to remain his balance for a second before falling backward into the wooden crate behind him with a loud crash. B winced.

"Whut wuss dat?" one of the guards drawled, his drunkenness clear even in his tone of voice.

Beyond heard footsteps as the two came to investigate, and he pulled his arms and legs to his chest, trying to be as invisible as possible.

It didn't work.

"Whath are yo' doin' here?" the first yelled, grabbing Beyond by the shoulder and yanking him off the ground.

"He loo's like twuble, 'oss!"

Beyond visibly shook. He hadn't thought to bring anything with him, so all he had was the box of matches hidden in his pocket. In the corner of his eye, he saw a can of gasoline farther back in the alley. But how was he going to get over there?

His thoughts were knocked out of him with his breath as he slammed to the ground, and he screamed. Or at least he attempted too. Before he had a chance to take in a breath he was in the air again, a hand over his mouth.

"Don' 'ou daer ma'e a sundz!"

B bit down on the hand, hard, and the bald man screeched, dropping Beyond, who attempted to run back the way he had came, grinding his teeth with every jolt of pain that shot up his back with every step he took.

"Tha' bas'ard! He bloothy bit me!" the man yelled, then trained his rage-filled eyes back on Beyond, and the group, all seven of them now, ran after the boy.

It didn't take long for them to catch up.

One grabbed Beyond by the arm and threw him to the ground, laughing and kicking him. B kept inching backward between kicks until the can of gasoline was within reach. He noticed that there was a hole in the top, and reached for it. Managing to grab the can, he swung it toward the men. They laughed and, even in their drunken state, avoided the can easily. But they didn't avoid the decent sized stream of gasoline flowing from the hole in the can like a golden banner.

"Oi, loo'! He twied to fought back!" said one of them, stumbling over his words and laughing.

Beyond reached for his pocket, yelping as he was kicked in the face, and slipped the tiny box out. He quickly pulled out a match and struck it against the top of the lighting strip and threw it toward the man with the most gasoline on his shirt. The man screamed bloody murder as his shirt caught fire, and the others panicked. Beyond heard a splash as he pushed himself up and took off running, limping the whole way back to Wammy's. He had to stop several times, and by the time he got back to the orphanage he could hardly walk, let alone breathe. He slipped in and up the stairs, returning to his room.

B glanced at Near, who was sleeping soundly, and limped over to his dresser. He pulled out his usual long sleeved white shirt and jeans, slipping them on while stifling gasps of pain and soaking up blood with his previous shirt. When he was done, he hid his bloody clothing under the dresser and slipped into his bed, willing sleep to come quickly and take the pain away.


	6. Ch 5, Afterward

**EDIT: yayyyyyy editation!**** So you see Tawny, I ADDED NAMES NAO. YEAH, I WAS LAZY BEFORE, BUT NAOOOO LOOK!**

**A/N: DOUBLE-UPDATE! AGAIN! BOO-YAH!**

**A special thanks to all my readers, Especually those of you who continuously put up with mah fillerz (yes, Jackie-chan, as you/G pertain(s) to this ff, you/G are/is filler. CHU CAN HAZ SUCK IT.) & short chappies (like this one ._.)**

* * *

><p><em>"…Eleven people died last night in a fire on the outskirts of Winchester. Six of those eleven have been identified as members of a small gang, who appeared to have robbed a store at the scene prior to the fire, while the other five were residents in apartments nearby. By request of the families, the identities of three of the gangmembers and one of the victims will not be announced at this time, however the police have released that Pépin Rush, Melvyn Matthewson, and Teddy 'Jack' Perish were some of those involved in the crime. Twenty year old Jesse and twenty-two year old Tom Jones, forty year old Roddy Endicott, and four year old Gwendolyn Elvina Shanelle died that night and this morning from severe burns and smoke inhalation. It is not yet clear if there are any witnesses, but if you have any information please contact the anonymous witness hotline..."<em>

The male reporter continued on with a story about some old woman who had been hit by a car, but Beyond wasn't concerned with that. He only thought about what he had done last night, about what the reporter had said. _Eleven people dead… and I killed them…_ he thought to himself, trying his best to simultaneously not show his thoughts. He rarely paid attention to the news, which was on for everyone at the orphanage during breakfast every day. Hardly anyone else paid attention either, except for when stories about cases L had solved were broadcast, and today was the same. Everyone was focused on their personal conversations and food, not particularly caring about what was going on around them. Beyond was thankful for that.

He wasn't eating, he couldn't- not only was guilt pouring over him but his jaw hurt, and he knew that as soon as he tried his lips would start bleeding again.

The only one who seemed to notice was Aislinn.

"You okay, B?" she asked, her concern showing in her eyes.

"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine…"

"You're pale. More than usual. You've got scars on your lips, and a bruise on your forehead. You're not eating. We're having _jam_ and biscuits for breakfast. I don't think you're 'fine.'" Ash said, sounding very much like his mother. "What happened?"

"Nothing, really. I just fell down the stairs. My head still hurts a bit, and that's why I'm a little out of it." He received a disbelieving look. "Really." He smiled, trying to make it convincing.

Apparently, it worked.

To a certain degree.

"Oh, fine," she sighed, "then are you ready for History?"

"…No. I hate History."

Aislinn laughed. "Come on, B." she said, pulling him away from his uneaten breakfast.


	7. Ch 6, Nightwatcher

**EDIT: ... thees haz ben editoyed. ahnd Beyond's damentayed. ahnd paranahoid.**

**A/N: GAH, I'm sick, I have a headache, & I have WB DX**

**& yet I fear for my life, so I type ._.**

**Thank you, Jackie-chan, for that sadistic idea ._. It will come into play soon... but not quite yet. As promised, your cookie... ( . ` ' . , ') ...it's a demented cookie :/ But it's chocolate chip! :D**

**Sorry for the short chappie :/ Again :/ But it's longer than the last one! :D By, like, 200 words x3**

* * *

><p>~<br>_Three days no sleeping_  
><em>He gave eating<em>  
><em>He sold his mother's rings<em>  
><em>She said nothing,<em>  
><em>And pretended not to know<em>  
>~<p>

"B?" came a soft, childish voice from across the room, "Are you still awake?"

Beyond didn't answer.

It was just after two in the morning, three days after the fire, and he hadn't slept or eaten since. He had become gaunt and thin, and he always felt tired. But he could never sleep. The needed numb had come the night of the fire, but after that the peaceful darkness never came. He just tossed and turned all night, thinking about what he had done, about the consequences of him getting away. He felt guilty about it, but he knew that he wanted to be there when Ash died. He wanted to be there to stop her death from happening, if he could.

It was all he had wanted, ever since he had come to the orphanage.

And yet... Eleven lives for two. It was justified in Beyond's eyes, but what about in the eyes of someone else? What would happen if they found out who had started the fire? It wasn't like Beyond could tell them why he needed to survive, that he had seen Aislinn's death date... or the ones of the men who had cornered him.

He had noticed the dates, all _10101997_, but the thought that he would be the one to kill them hadn't crossed his mind. How could it? He had been scared out of his wits, all thought on trying to save his own life, and he was only a mere ten year old boy, versus seven full-grown men, all drunk. It seemed much more likely that they would have gotten into a car accident, or something of the like... but he had killed them.

It was a sin.

Justice was his mentor.

Justice would find him, surely.

Justice would punish him if he found out.

Justice must not find out.

Justice, L, must not know of what he had done, nor what he planned to do.

The thoughts pieced themselves together in his rapidly-churning brain, plans forming.

Suddenly, B knew how to he was going spend his sleepless nights, for he was sure they wouldn't stop, that the guilt wouldn't go away. He knew-

"B?" came the voice again, interrupting his thoughts, and they scattered.

Beyond growled. "What do you want, Near?"

"Beyond seems restless, and Near is curious. What has happened?" The little sock was observant, even just being just four years of age.

It was infuriating.

"Nothing! Just shut up and go to sleep," he growled in annoyance. He hadn't meant to seem so harsh... but he liked it. It felt good, fulfilling, like relief, as if it got rid of some of the hurt from his still-painful bruises.

Near didn't say anything else, just rolled over, seemingly going back to sleep.

_Damn he's annoying... _B thought to himself.

But Near was right.

He had been restless.

It was true, he hadn't eaten, or slept, since the fire. But he had been restless before then too. He had been itching for something to do, loathing the simple and boring life here at Wammy's.

It was time.

Beyond was going to have some fun.

He lay there in his bed for a few more minutes to make sure Near was asleep, then slipped off the bed, slowly tip-toeing to the other end of the room and cracking the door open just enough for him to fit through. Down the hallway and toward Aislinn's dorm he crept, silent, until he got to her door. He opened it slightly and slipped inside, making his silent way toward her bed. He glanced at Ash's roommate Casey, who was fast asleep under an orange comforter, and sighed relief. He then crouched next to Ash's bed, watching her sleep, his lip quivering.

03131998.

March 13th, 1998.

He would be there.

He would protect her.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: STALKER MUCH? O.o But I guess that's BB for you...**


	8. Ch 7, Unwinding

**EDIT: hey look, I'm editing! **

**A/N: Beware of timeskipz! D: This chappie is full of them... I pretty much just threw a bunch of stuff that normally would have been tineh mineh chapters together... This chapter was quickly written and I'll probably edit later... or, liek, delete it ._.**

**Special un-thanks to Shadehness for randomly telling me to use Trigonometry xD I hate chu! :D (...to anyone else- don't try to understand it XD)**

* * *

><p>A month later, Beyond heard a knock at his door. He growled softly, annoyed. "Who is it?"<p>

"It's Aislinn..." came the soft reply. Immediately Beyond wiped the annoyance from his tone, not wanting to upset Ash.

"Come in!" he called out. The door knob turned, and Aislinn walked into the room, dressed in her normal red hoodie, jeans, and combat boots, with her wooden cross necklace dangling around her neck. But she was different, looked different- there were bags under her eyes, she walked slowly, as if shy, and her normally sweet and joyful brown eyes seemed exasperated and worried. She looked... similar to the way Beyond had, before he had took up eating his jam again. After four days of no eating or sleeping, he had been practically unable to move from his bed. A didn't look that bad, but she definitely didn't look well.

"B... could you please help me? With my math homework?" she asked, voice tentative, as if she was afraid of something.

"Um... sure. What exactly is it you're needing help with?" Since when to Ash need help with schoolwork?

"Trigonometry. I don't get all this sin and cos and tan stuff..."

"Oh... Well that's simple enough!" and so he began explaining about the hypotenuse, adjacent sides and angles, and other things of the like. By the time he was finished, Aislinn seemed to understand it, but she still seemed nervous.

"I think I got it now... Thanks B, I don't know how I didn't understand that!" she laughed nervously, hurrying out of the room.

Beyond watched her as she left the dorm. This wasn't like her... It worried B.

. . .

Aislinn closed B's door behind her. _Stupid stupid stupid! Why is it so hard for me to get this stuff? I'm first in line to be L's successor! This should make sense to me! B gets it... Heck, I bet Grace knows this, and Daniel, and all the younger kids, and I don't. Am I really that dumb? That useless? They expect more from me than this!_

. . .

B looked up from his Science project when he heard a knock at the door. _Again? This is the third time this week she's needed me to tutor her..._

"Beyond? It's social sciences this time..."

. . .

_"You're nothing but a Back-up!"_

_The words didn't make sense. Beyond was his alias, and besides that... Although these kids were older, he was in line ahead of them. Weren't they insulting themselves as well?_

_"Back-up! Back-up!"_

_The shadowy figures laughed. But it wasn't a happy laugh. No, it was one filled with menace..._

_One of the shadows sent a kick in the direction of Beyond's head, and he felt a searing pain, then dark._

Beyond shook his head, ridding himself of the memory. He supposed it was true- He was just a back-up in case A didn't work out as L. But the kids that had been making fun of him were of lower rankings. They weren't even back-ups- they were extras.

. . .

Ms. Miller set Aislinn's test on her desk gingerly, as if disappointed in the girl. She whispered something softly to her, then handed a test to the person behind her, passing down the line. The teacher's words rang in Aislinn's ears.

"Ash, I know that this is a low grade for you. But I'm sure that if you just try harder, you'll be able to pass the next one."

Aislinn couldn't believe it. She had gotten a D. And she just didn't get why.

Ms. Miller, the other teachers, Roger, they didn't get it. It wasn't that she wasn't trying, because she was, as hard as she could. She stayed up all night some nights studying, and B helped tutor her this time.

_That's right, Beyond helped me this time... Not only am I failing L and myself, but I'm failing Beyond. I don't want to fail them... I want to live up to their expectations... So why can't I do it? Why can't I be perfect, like B? I try, as hard as I can, and yet these things slip my grasp... They call me genius... And then they tell me why I'm not. I just... don't know what to do anymore. Do I keep trying? Or just accept that I'll never be what they want me to be? What if I can't do it? What if I don't want to be L anymore? I've seen it, B... he's become so much like L. The way he dresses, the way he acts, the way he sits... He's even just as smart as L. But I don't want to be like that... I don't want to be L. I like L, I really do... He's like my father. But I want to be myself, not a duplicate... Have they ever felt like this? So scared, depressed, despairing? Have you, L? B? If you have, you must be so much stronger than me... I'm not sure I can handle it anymore. I can't compare to B. Why keep trying?_

. . .

When the bell rang, everyone rushed out the door. See, Wammy's House wasn't that much unlike other schools. Besides the fact that you lived on campus, you had no known living relatives with the ability and will to take care of you, and that you were a super genius, life was like it might be for anyone else your age. Most people didn't actually enjoy the classes, and slept half the day away. After class was video games or shopping or 'Lnch at E's drm aftr skul'. There were preps, and goths, and jocks, and emos, and losers, and nerds. Ah, yes, nerds among the biggest nerds in the world.

It was evident in the halls; the similarities, and the differences. But one thing was clear; even the least motivated kids were determined to become L. But how many of them knew what that meant? That it meant a life of solitude, and certain death? How many of them were ready to take on the consequences of being the world's greatest detective, identity known by none but presence known by all?

How many of them realized who A and B were?

A was the Alternative.

B was the Backup.

Nothing more, nothing less.

At that moment, this truth came crashing down on Aislinn, washing away all the fun she had thought reality was.


	9. Ch 8, Worry

**EDIT: nooooooooo I skipped Marshmello's birthdayyyyyy D: XD & about it being my first half-decent chapter... I'm rereading it... I think my others were wayyyy better XDX**

**A/N: If you're epic, you'll go to my profile, click the link for my fictionpress, and read all my original poems & stories :3**

**nah, jk, you all are awesome anyways ._.**

**honestly, I think this might be my first half-decent chapter ._.**

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><p><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: TWO MONTHS 21 DAYS - DECEMBER 15TH, 1997<strong>

* * *

><p>Aislinn rolled over in her bed, groaning in pain. <em>What's going on?<em>

"Ash? You okay?" asked her dorm-mate Casey, sitting up, her orange comforter slipping down as she did so. As soon as the ravenhead finished her question, she popped a piece of bubblegum into her mouth, then another, then another. The young girl kept several packs on the oak bedside table, along with a small lamp and a stack of books, and every waking moment she was always chewing at least two pieces.

"My stomach..." Aislinn managed to say while at the same time curling up in a ball and gripping her sides.

"Uh... S-should I get Roger?"

Aislinn shook her head fiercely for a moment, jaw clenched.

Casey's green eyes widened. "I... I really think I should go tell someone..."

Aislinn's jaws parted, letting out a pained gasp for air. "No... No... I don't need Roger..." Tears started running down her cheeks, and she shut her eyes, only to open them again as more tears flooded her vision.

Casey leaped out of bed, running across the room and flipping the light switch. Both girls winced at the sudden brightness, but Casey could tell that Aislinn had a headache from her reaction to the light. "Ash... I'm gonna go get Roger, I'll be right back," she said, turning tail and flinging the door open. She took off running down the hall, calling for a certain old man, and undoubtedly waking up everyone on that side of the orphanage.

Aislinn clamped her eyes shut once again, not understanding why she was in so much pain.

And that was how Roger found the young girl- Curled up in the fetal position, eyes streaming tears, and sheets knotted around her ankles. After trying to get sense from her pained replies of 'It hurts, it hurts' and failing, he left her room to call the House's doctor, concern creasing his already wrinkled face.

In the hall, children gathered, awaken by Casey's calls for help. Roger had told them to stay outside the room, but of course there was one boy who didn't listen.

Beyond Birthday.

Pushing kids out of his way, B burst into the room, running to the side of Aislinn's bed.

"Ash? What's going on Ash?" B noticed that the ravenhead's knuckles were bleached white, her tear-streaked face a similar shade, and that her nails were short and rugged, as if they had been continuously chewed for hours on end.

"My stomach... My head... It all hurts..." she sobbed, every word causing her to shudder with pain.

Beyond was utterly puzzled, confused, concerned. For the first time in his life, he didn't get what was going on, didn't understand, didn't know what to do. He was supposed to protect Ash, and now all he could do was stand there uselessly, not knowing how to react.

After what seemed like hours to both Beyond and Aislinn, the doctor rushed in, and B leaped out of the way of the large, heavy-set, white-clad man.

"Alright," the doctor began, his voice gruff, "Can you tell me what hurts?"

"My stomach... A-and my head... Aches..."

The doctor carefully pried Aislinn's hands from her death grip around her rib cage. Aislinn neither resisted nor helped him, just lay there limp and crying as the doctor listened to her heart rate, examined and felt her stomach, shined a light into her eyes, took her temperature.

Beyond stood there the whole time, making sure that the chubby man didn't hurt Aislinn, his eyes shining with fierce protectiveness. He mildly noted the doctor's name- Jadyn VanCharles Grant, and that his death date was only a year from now. If he hadn't been so worried, he might have mused at the oddity of his name and laugh at his expiration date, but at the moment he didn't feel like musings. All he wanted was to know what was wrong with Ash.

Finally, the doctor sighed, standing up.

"She has a stomach ulcer," he announced, matter-of-factly.

"And?" Roger pried, almost as worried as Beyond.

"I'm afraid there's really nothing I can do for it at the moment. Stomach ulcers are usually caused by stress..." The man's voice drifted off and his grey-brown eyes strayed from Aislinn to meet Roger's with a question.

The old man nodded knowingly. "I see... Thank you, Dr. Grant." With that, he showed the doctor out of the room and out of the orphanage, the two talking for a moment just outside the door, and then Roger came back, going upstairs again to Aislinn's dorm.

By now, the crowd had vanished, and the only ones to stay in the room were Beyond and Casey.

"Beyond, Casey, I really think you should leave Aislinn alone for a while. Perhaps you could share a room with Grace and Jaded?" the old man asked, directing the question toward Casey. The young girl nodded grimly. Grace was a little loud, or rather, VERY loud, and Jaded was... scary, but she guessed that she didn't really have a choice. Obediently she paced out of the room and down the hall, but Beyond stayed.

"...Beyond? Did you hear me?"

"I'm not leaving."

Roger sighed. This was going to be a problem.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Bwahahaha, Jaded has returned x3 And she's scaring little kids that are two years older than her x3 (For those of you who know anything about Jaded, yes, it is torturing her to share a dorm with Grace XD I'm just evil to my favorite OCs like that.)**

**Anyway, I hope you liked it! Next chapter will bring more of BB's angsty antics!**


	10. Ch 9, That Easy

**EDIT: HAHA it's chapter nien now XD**

**A/N: x3 so tired, but can't sleep DX anyone else ever felt like that?**

**Reviews are always welcome~ :3 I haven't gotten any for last chapter yet D:**

**WHOA! Chapter 10! I've hit a mild milestone. And yet, this story is winding down... I can't help but think that this won't go past 15 chapters :/ maybe 20, at most... but then again, Another Note itself only had, what, 4? *goes to check her copy of it* 7, plus a prologue and an authors note. fail on my part. XDX So I guess I'm already past that... but then again, they were decently long chapters... which is more than I can say for most of mine x3**

**And, alas, Christmas is coming up in this little story of ours! That should be interesting... Or at least, as interesting as I can make it. x3 And ironically, where I am, it's summer. x3**

**Anyway, here it is, Chapter 10! (By far the longest chapter so far! :D ...of course that could be from the author's note...)**

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><p><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: TWO MONTHS 20 DAYS - DECEMBER 16TH, 1997<strong>

* * *

><p>~<br>_He started stealing,_  
><em>To supply the feeling,<em>  
><em>Found out he pulled a knife,<em>  
><em>On someone's wife<em>  
><em>And held it to her throat<em>  
>~<p>

B growled under his breath. After refusing to leave, Roger, with great difficulty, had physically removed him from the room. It was currently just after midnight, and Beyond was in his room once again, glaring at his albino roommate who was sleeping oh-so-soundly. Did he not care about Aislinn at all?

No one was allowed to see her, and all she could do is lay down in that room and try to sleep while the pain killers and sleeping pills the doctor had given Roger attempted to melt the pain away.

Beyond knew what was causing A such stress. Her grades were slipping, same with her rank, and the adults were starting to regard her differently, passing it off as laziness. L noticed, but he didn't do anything, didn't think there was anything he could do that wouldn't just upset her farther. Every time she had a personal lesson with him, she started crying as soon as she left the room. Beyond noticed, but he didn't know what to do either.

He wanted to help, but he couldn't.

It infuriated him.

Quietly, he tip-toed across the room to a window. Glancing back at the sleeping sheep look-alike, he slid the window open and slipped out onto the roof. For a moment, he clutched the windowsill to keep from sliding down the slick shingled surface to his untimely demise, but after a few seconds he had steadied himself.

_One, two..._ he took a deep breath. _Three!_

The young boy took off running, continuously sliding downwards as he ran, but managing to stay in the middle of the roof. When he reached the edge that overlooked another, lower piece of roofing, he jumped, hitting the "ground" with a loud thump. He wasn't worried about being heard, though- At the moment, he was over the kitchen, and it was too late for the cooks to be cleaning up and too early for them to be making breakfast.

Before he could slide over the edge involuntarily, he crawled to the other side of the angled surface, reaching a corner with a drain pipe overrun with vines. This he climbed up to yet another higher piece of roofing that turned a corner.

And then he saw it.

The window in Aislinn's room.

He ran for it, clutching the windowsill for dear life when he stopped. Slowly he attempted to lift the sill, but it wouldn't budge.

They... locked it?

The thought infuriated him. He banged on the window, intent on waking Ash up and having her open it. "Ash? Ash! Come open the window!"

The only thing Aislinn responded with was a moan, which Beyond was unable to hear through the glass. After trying unsuccessfully for a few more minutes, he pounded his fist on the wall once in frustration, then took off back down the roof, jumping once again onto the lower patch of roofing. By now, his feet were bleeding, but he didn't care. He kept running, going to yet another drain pipe with vines of ivy entangled around it- The place was infested with ivy, the leafy vines covering practically all of the west wall.

He clambered down the vines, taking off as soon as he hit the ground, despite his bleeding feet. He ducked under the spot in the bushes once again, for the eighth time that month.

. . .

_"L?"_

"What is it, Watari? Not B again?"

_"I'm afraid so, sir. Also, Alternative has been diagnosed with an ulcer."_

L sighed deeply, not even bothering to tell Watari not to call A such an impending name. He had noticed changes in both A's and B's behavior, A becoming stressed and B becoming restless, but it was getting a bit too far.

"Don't do anything about B, don't even tell Roger this time. I will take care of this matter soon. And as for A... I'd like to see her as soon as she as deemed ready."

_"Yes sir."_

. . .

Beyond slowed down for a minute, trying to catch his breath. He had ran practically all the way from Wammy's- avoiding the alleys this time- and his chest ached, as if he could feel his lungs ramming against his ribcage as they expanded and contracted.

By now, his hands and feet had long sense gone numb in the cold night air, but he didn't have to look to know he was leaving bloody footprints on the sidewalk. He was lucky it hadn't snowed recently, for if it had, he was sure his feet wouldn't be red, but purple.

He walked down the street, ignoring the stares he got. Most people wouldn't care to get mixed up in someone else's life, and would leave him alone. But it irked him, to see so many happy people, and Christmas lights everywhere.

_That's right, it's almost Christmas time._

_Oh, that's always such a merry time._

_Fucking spectacular._

How could everyone just go on with their lives with what was going on in others'? Without a care?

Beyond growled at himself then. But wasn't that what he had been doing practically his whole life? Was doing now? He laughed at people when he saw they had just a few days left, or hours, or minutes even. Most of the time he didn't even care enough to see how they'd die.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by some cooing from off to his left.

"Oh, just look at him! His hair's so greasy, and look at his feet! The poor thing!"

He rolled his eyes. _Great._When he was thinking about people not caring, he wasn't talking about him, he was talking about Aislinn. Even the other Wammy orphans didn't seem to care. They just went about with the rest of their night, peacefully sleeping.

Now he just wished this woman would butt out.

He was absolutely fine.

But now, that same woman was dragging her husband over, still cooing. She looked to be about thirty, and Beyond smirked. She had just fifty years left, while her husband only had five. He hoped she was miserable those last forty-five years. He looked away again as she approached him.

"Excuse me, are you lost?"

Beyond didn't look at her, just kept walking.

"No."

"Well, do you need a place to stay? I'm sure I could find some clean clothes that would fit you in the attic, and you could take a shower, and I could patch up your fee-"

Beyond cut her off. "I'm fine." At any other time, those words would make her sound like a pedo, but he could tell she was sincere. He just didn't care.

The woman pursed her cherry red lips for a second.

"Are you sure? I cou-"

"LOOK, I'm fine, okay? !" Beyond yelled at the woman, and before he thought about what he was doing, he had pulled the pocket knife he had stolen from one of the caretakers out of his pocket and was holding it to her throat.

The woman gasped, eyes wide and clearly afraid, and her husband rushed over, knocking Beyond aside. He put his arms protectively around his wife.

But Beyond didn't care about that.

For a moment, he had seen the numbers above the woman's head flicker to near zero, to the exact date that was now today.

That meant two things.

One, there was a ninety-nine percent chance that he would have killed her. Two, he could change the numbers.

Did that mean that he could change when Aislinn would die? That maybe there was hope for her?

Beyond shook his head suddenly. For now, he just needed to get away before the man and his wife called the police. According to the government, he didn't exist, none of the Wammy's House orphans did, and it would be a huge problem if he was arrested.

He took off running, down an alley shortcut he had used plenty of times before, but he didn't head toward Wammy's.

He had almost done it again.

He had almost ended another life.

What the hell was wrong with him?

_How can it be_ that easy _to take a life?_


	11. Ch 10, Pastries

**EDIT: edit ._.**

**A/N: I just ripped an empty Coke can in half.**

**It was epic.**

**Weird, but epic.**

**I'D LIKE TO SEE BACON ON A REALITY SHOW. I'D LIKE TO SEE RANDOM PEOPLE TRY TO VOTE BACON OFF AN ISLAND. BECAUSE THEY COULDN'T DO IT. BECAUSE IT'S MOTHAFUKIN BACON.**

**...Because all that was extremely relevant.**

**Sarcasm in this chappie? O.o ._.**

**Believe it or not, this short lil chappie has lots of significance... even with as off-topic and random as it may seem.**

* * *

><p><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: TWO MONTHS 20 DAYS - DECEMBER 16TH, 1997<strong>

* * *

><p>By the time Beyond stopped running about an hour later, he had no idea where he was. He could no longer feel his face, and his feet and hands were starting to turn blue. He shivered, looking around for someplace warm.<p>

He saw one.

It was a simple, probably family-owned Chinese restaurant, which was slightly odd to see in Winchester. But Beyond didn't much care about where or how he got warm, he just didn't want to freeze to death.

Instead of going through the front, he went to the back door. _Because there's always a back door._ He couldn't help but smirk to himself. And besides, even if he did go through the front, he wasn't sure he would be welcome. As he slowly the ice-cold door handle, Beyond found that it was unlocked. He smirked. _How stupid could they be?_

Silently he slid the door open just enough for him to be able to slip through the gap between the door and the frame. Inside it was bright and warm, and he was in a white walled, white tiled kitchen. It was immaculate, and entwined with the scents of varying Chinese foods he could smell the fumes of cleaning products. He glanced toward the door to the part of the restaurant most people saw. The walls were a rich red, with oriental-style pictures everywhere. Chandeliers hung from the ceiling, bending and reflecting light, and the floor of the room was carpeted with a red and gold fabric, with more oriental designs. The door to the kitchen was directly behind the buffet, and past that were booths and seated tables.

Suddenly Beyond heard rumble, and he looked down, blushing an even _jollier_ shade of bright red. He glanced around, making sure no one was around, then crept over to the door to the front of the restaurant. He slipped out, seeing that the buffet was still half-filled with food. They must be taking the food out right now... He crouched behind the buffet table, standing up just enough to be able to see what was available.

Mostly it was varying vegetable mixes and chicken; they didn't even have the lo mein out anymore. He sighed, then saw something on the other end of the table. He crept over.

_Is that- Maybe- There's no way... They have jam._

Eagerly he reached for the bowl of jam, but then his eyes caught on a strange pastry to the left of the container. The were round, about the size of his fists, and were covered in sugar.

Chinese donuts.

He'd heard of them before, but he'd never actually had one.

He grabbed one with his now only slightly cold-flushed hand and took a bite. It tasted... weird. Like a cross between a biscuit and a donut. But it was delicious. He slathered some of the jam over the pastry and took another bite. Even better.

He heard some scuffling in the back and ducked down, waiting as one of the workers in a white apron took another bin of food. When he left, Beyond eyed the room until he saw a bin filled with bags for take-out. He ran over and snatched one, then ran back to the buffet table and put all the Chinese donuts in the bag. He wanted to take the jam, for it was sweeter than what they had back at the orphanage, but he couldn't find a container to put it in.

As silently as he had come he slipped out the back door once again, making a run for The Wammy House.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I don't even know if they had Chinese restaurants in Winchester in '97... AND HOLY CRAP IT'S PASSED MAH B-DAY IN THE STORY ._. December 4th... hoorah/fail xDx ...I think I also skipped Mello's birthday... ohwell... :/ ._.**

**and YAY for B-kun not B-ing (sorry, I had too.) a meaneh pants anymore! :D**  
><strong>...actually it's kinda boring without him being a meaneh pants...<strong>

**RANDOM-ASS THANKS TO:**

**BeyondEvolAndGrace (Hannah), jakethedog (Jackie-chan Dryer-kun), and QueenofAshes (Ashee) for harassing me randomly and periodically (makes sense) to hurry the fuck up with these chappies~**

**SongoftheShadows, ILoveBeyondBirthday, and ILBB (same as the previous? ._.) for reviewing~**

**Tawnyshine and Shadeh for randomly helping me & proofreading mah chappies~ :3**

**AND WHOEVER ELSE HAS READ THIS FF! Even if you haven't reviewed, I love you for just reading it...~**

**Lol, yeah, I'm done. I just didn't think the A/N was long enough before.**


	12. Ch 11, Of Gifts and Obsessions

**EDIT: edit ._. HAY GUESS WHAT? IN NEXT CHAPPIE, ET'S CHRISTMAS TIEM! :D**

**A/N: There are some people doubting the relevance of the last chapter... *cough* TAWNY *cough* so this extra-long (for me, at least) chapter is dedicated to proving you wrong. and to some slightly unrelated shit. bwahahaha.**

**VVV Have you noticed that the little date down der hasn't changed for three chapters? ._. VVV**

* * *

><p><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: TWO MONTHS 20 DAYS - DECEMBER 16TH, 1997TWO MONTHS 19 DAYS - DECEMBER 17TH, 1997**

* * *

><p>"Roger... I was wondering... Could I go see A now?"<p>

"Not yet, she's resting," the old man replied, not even looking up from his paperwork. It was about five in the afternoon, and Beyond was getting impatient.

"But Roger... I brought her something..." B pleaded, doing his best to look like an innocent, adorable little child.

It didn't exactly work.

Oh, how he wished he was five again.

It made getting things done your own way so much easier.

Roger looked down at him and arched an eyebrow, "Something being what?"

"...Chinese donuts."

Roger sighed, rubbing his temple. "How you got your hands on those I'm not even going to ask..."

_Good,_ thought Beyond to himself.

"...But I'm afraid that you still can't be allowed to see her. She's probably dead asleep from the painkillers and sleeping pills."

Beyond froze for a second at the word 'dead', then sighed inwardly when the old man finished his sentence. He flashed another pleading look at Roger and, when he got no response, trudged off to his and Near's room.

_If you won't let me see her, I'll just have to find a way to do so myself..._ He stared blankly at the heater vent opposite him on the pale yellow wall as he thought, scooping out jam from a jar and licking it off his fingers. He was sure he couldn't get to her room from the roof- The window was more than likely still locked, as her door would be, and besides, now the roof was dusted with snow.

He paused in thinking for a second, focusing on the heater vent instead. _Why is it so far up the wall?_ He pondered, with only mild interest. _It's only half a foot from the ceiling. In the girls' dorms they're only a few inches off the floor..._ He narrowed his eyes at that thought. The air ducts. It was perfect.

Grinning to himself he left the room, jam left behind but his present for A still in-hand.

. . .

He knocked on the pale brown wooden door, feeling sly and a bit cocky. The old coon would learn that Beyond gets what Beyond wants, one way or another.

"Hey!" Grace answered in her usual overly-enthusiastic sing-song voice, grinning from ear to ear when she saw who it was at the door. "Beyond! What's up?"

"I was wondering if I could take a peek inside your room."

Grace raised an eyebrow. "What? Why would you want to do that? Don't tell me you've suddenly become a perv, I'll tell Aislinn!"

Beyond felt like smacking her, though when he thought about it, it was a strange request. "No! I have something for Ash, but Roger won't let me give it to her. I was thinking..." he let his eyes wander to the inside of the room. For a second he was shocked.

Half of the room was exactly the way he had seen it that day he had found out about the second of Grace's quirks- Shoes were everywhere, and bowls of white gravy (How she could consume so much of that stuff and not get sick was beyond him) littered the bookshelves. The walls were a pale, creamy white, and the bed on that side had a simple, neatly folded-back pink comforter with white sheets poking out from underneath. There were a few posters here-and-there of the latest popular musicians which were probably snuck in without Roger's knowing.

However, on the other side, dark colored posters of freakish faces and the newest metal and rock bands coated the walls, corners and edges overlapped to make more room for other posters. Even the air vent was covered. _Great..._ The bed on the other side had an electric blue comforter and black sheets that were falling halfway off the bed, and it clearly hadn't been made in a while. On the bedside table was the largest gathering of soft caramel candies he'd ever seen.

And then his eyes traveled to the farthest, darkest, most reclusive corner of the room.

There sat a red-headed, emerald-eyed girl- the one that had arrived at the orphanage at the same time as Mello. Her hair was short, just brushing the bottom of her jaw, and it covered one of her brilliant eyes, while the other one seemed to bore into his soul. It was intense. She was wearing faded and ripped jeans, black combat boots, and a black tee with what looked like neon paint splatters all over it. On her hands were black leather fingerless cloves, and around her neck was a necklace pendant in the shape of a skull. It was obvious she was chewing something, and he figured it was one of the caramels. On her head she was wearing headphones, and the cord snaked down to meet a silver Sony Walkman.

Beyond could hear a thick drum beat and a guitar ripping through chords from the doorway.

"...Whoa."

Grace laughed nervously. "That's Jaydead. I think you should leave her alone. Like, I_ really_ think you should leave her alone."

The name caught his attention. He hadn't cared much when she'd arrived, but suddenly he was curious. "Jaydead? I don't remember that being anyone's alias..." Floating above her head was a name in seemingly Russian or Greek characters, but he wasn't completely sure. _Анастасья Радослава... Anastasia Radeoslava? Such a common first name._ He sighed inwardly with distaste. He didn't bother focusing on her life span, for to be honest he didn't care, but her name had interested him.

"Oh, it's not. Her alias is Jaded, but everyone calls her Jaydead because... Well yeah," she said, glancing back, clearly a bit afraid. "She responds better to Jaydead anyway. I think she likes it... but you can never be sure..." Grace let her voice drift off in a creepy way, then smiled to herself as if proud. "Hn. That was good."

Beyond stifled a chuckle. "She's only five, right?"

"She turned six in October... But yes, she's not that old. But that doesn't mean she's not scary..." she trailed off again.

Beyond had to try his best not to laugh. Sure, the shock of seeing such a dark six year old and the transformation of the room had left him speechless for a moment, but now he found it highly amusing how scared-but-not Grace seemed. "I'm pretty sure even you could fend off a six year old, Grace."

She either didn't notice the hidden insult or didn't care to address it, because when she spoke it wasn't a snarky reply. "Not this six year old. She gave F a run for his money earlier."

F? Beyond had only seen the kid once, and he didn't even know his full alias. "Isn't he fifteen?"

Grace nodded; he was the oldest kid currently at Wammy's, being only a year younger than L.

Beyond remembered now. F wasn't exactly... fit, per say, but he _was_ fifteen.

Then Beyond started laughing. It was a natural, smooth laugh, and it startled Grace quite a bit.

"I'd stop that if I were you... I think she can hear what we're saying." Grace whispered.

Beyond managed to tone down the laugh to a mild snicker. "Whatever. Anyway, I was wondering if I could use the air vents to-"

"-To get to her room?" finished the blond for him. It made B feel a little dumb for not coming up with it right away, and then having Grace know exactly what he was planning.

"Yeah."

"Talk to Jaydead, the one connecting to Ash's room is on her side."

Beyond sneered. This will be fun.

. . .

Twenty minutes later, Beyond was panting and he had a black eye. That wasn't fun.

He grimaced at the girl, then glanced behind him. Grace had left, apparently not 'able to bare watching' what was coming, and had said she'd be with her Italian boyfriend, Sev. _Since when did she have a boyfriend? And how does she know he's Italian? Don't tell me the fool was stupid enough to tell her where he came from... She'd blabber all about it. She just had._ Beyond had mused before confronting the redhead.

But now all thoughts of Sev and Grace had been erased. He'd just had his ass kicked by a girl half his size, and she had hardly broken a sweat. And she had been smiling for the latter half of the fight. _Well, we'll see how she responds to this..._ With one more cautious glance behind him, he pulled a knife from his pocket. It was the very same knife Roger had confiscated a few months ago- He had retrieved it from a drawer in his desk.

At the same moment, Jaded drew a knife from her right combat boot.

Now Beyond was shocked. "How did you..."

"Same as you." the girl smiled sweetly.

Beyond sighed, defeated, then stood and turned away. "Fine, whatever. I'll just find another way in... This isn't worth it." he mumbled.

"Or," the redhead began, "You could've just asked."

Beyond froze in his tracks, silent rage racking through his body. "...And you waited until now to tell me that." It wasn't a question but a statement, one that was dripping with anger.

"Yup," the girl smirked. "I've decided I like you. I get why Mello thinks you're cool."

It took all of Beyond's self control not to turn around and punch her again. He sighed, exasperated. "Then will you _please_ move your poster and let me use the air vent?" he asked, his tone underlaid with sarcasm as he stuffed the knife back into his pocket.

"Sure."

Not only did the young girl move her poster, but she also grabbed a screwdriver from seemingly nowhere and unhinged the cover.

"Thanks," B grumbled as he picked up the somehow-undamaged bag of pastries (which were starting to get stale) and carefully tossed it inside the metal vent, wincing as the sound of the impact was amplified. He could see the light from Aislinn's room from where he was. Jaded handed him the screwdriver, and he nodded another unwilling thanks.

"You're welcome. I'll leave it open but covered until you get back," came the reply as Beyond crawled into the vent.

He could almost hear the smirk in her voice.

. . .

Beyond fidgeted with the screws on the inside of the vent for about ten minutes before he got them to pop out. _That is so much easier to do from the outside... By now, this is hardly worth it._

"Ash?" B called as he squeezed out of the duct and out into the room Aislinn and Casey shared.

"Huh? B?" the female ravenhead tried to sit up to get a better view, but ended up moaning and laying her head back down to rest on her pillow.

After pulling the bag of pastries into the open and getting to his feet, Beyond walked over to Aislinn's bed. "Guess what I have for you," he smiled.

Aislinn shook her head. She didn't want to think.

For a second Beyond's smile faltered, but he plastered it back on to his face, determined to seem joyful. He handed over the bag of treats with a devilish grin on his face, watching as Aislinn took a pastry out of the bag.

"What are these?"

"Chinese donuts. They're delicious. Try one."

Aislinn did as she was told, taking a small bite out of the donut. "Mmm..." she mumbled, stuffing the rest of the pastry into her mouth.

Beyond couldn't help but laugh. "You like them?" He was rethinking what he had said and thought earlier about it not being worth it.

Aislinn grinned back, though wincing slightly with pain. "They're awesome. Thanks, B."

Suddenly the girl sat up, placing a crummy peck of a kiss on Beyond's cheek.

Both ravenheads darkened several shades, and Beyond smiled sadly. Just a little less than three months...

. . .

The next day, Roger went to check on A and to ask her if she wanted anything to eat.

The successor gave a double worded reply:

"Chinese donuts."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: NAO WHUT, TAWNY?**

**Er, I mean, random people doubting the relevance of my extremely relevant chapter.**

**AIYE TOLD CHU THE DAMN THING HAD SIGNIFICANCE, AND I MEANT THAT THE DAMN THING HAD SIGNIFICANCE! CHU CAN HAZ SUCK ET.**

**So, how many of you actually noticed that Ash didn't have a quirk? BE HONEST! I really want to know how many people noticed my minor-and-originally-accidental-plothole (which I actually have a bunch that I've noticed, BTW, but I'm too lazy to fix. See if you can spot them all!)**

**& lol, random Jaded focus. SHE'S BACK. While I was writing, it reminded me of a video game & there's like always this grumpy NPC that you have to satisfy before they let you through. That's not what I intended. XDX But do you think the stuff about Sev & the whole thing with Jaded was good or bad? Was it unnecessary, or did it add to the story?**

**& I know that BB got Jaded's name translation wrong. Her name is actually Anastas'ya (a *rare* (lol, BB fail) variation of Anastasia) [pronounced "ahn-ah-STAS-yuh", I believe, but correct me if I'm wrong] Radoslava ["rah-dah-SLAH-vah"]. But hey, no one's perfect x3 Not even our "darling" Beyond.**

**REVIEWS ARE TO ME WHAT CHINESE DONUTS NOW ARE TO AISLINN!  
><strong>


	13. Ch 12, Most Wonderful Time of the Year

**A/N: I'm sorry for not updating! D: I've had sooo muchhh writer'sss blockkk... But hey, at least I update faster than SOME people I know... *several cyber glares* Also, school has started *how many months ago?*, so... I haz excuse? :3 . . . MY NAME IS PINCAAAA!**

**ALSO, I EDITED ALL THE CHAPTERS :D there are some major/minor things that I changed, so I DO suggest you go back and read it. See if you catch something ;)**

* * *

><p><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: TWO MONTHS 12 DAYS - DECEMBER 24TH, 1997  TWO MONTHS 11 DAYS - DECEMBER 25TH, 1997**

* * *

><p><em>"On the eighth day of Christmas, Sir Wammy gave to meee~"<em>

Beyond rolled his eyes as the younger children- and, in Grace's case, the older ones- sang their modified version of _The Twelve Days of Christmas._

_"Eight tests a-testing, Seven minds are blinding, Six rich-man riches, Five genius children, Four calls to justice, Three true successors, Two old men caring, and The best man to ever live!"_

_I'm pretty sure this infringes some copyright somewhere, _he mused; he was in a surprisingly good mood.

_"On the ninth day of Christmas, Sir Wammy gave to meee~"_

To his right sat Aislinn, attempting to keep the tune between her coughing fits. Over the last few days she had gotten sicker and sicker; her already creamy pale skin now a sickly white, and her once lively eyes now dull. She had eaten nothing but Chinese donuts (occasionally with jam) since that day, and it wasn't doing her much good nutrition-wise, not to mention the stomach ulcer she hadn't-quite gotten over yet.

_"Nine joyful orphans, Eight tests a-testing, Seven minds are blinding, Six rich-man riches, Five genius children, Four calls to justice, Three true successors, Two old men caring, and The best man to ever live!"_

And yet, she seemed to be cheery and joyful, and even her eyes, which for a while now had been listless, held their old spark.

_"On the tenth day of Christmas, Sir Wammy gave to meee~"_

It was Christmas time, and everyone was in a good mood. Roger had a good-natured smile on his face as he attempted to conduct the makeshift carolers, Jaded was making fun of the other children's choice of lyrics with Mello, and even B saw the cheeriness of the occasion. And that wasn't it- This year, L had personally chosen the presents that the orphans would get from 'Santa', so they would get more than just a six month supply of their selective obsession, which was what Roger usually got them.

_"Ten million dollars, Nine joyful orphans, Eight tests a-testing, Seven minds are blinding, Six rich-man riches, Five genius children, Four calls to justice, Three true successors, Two old men caring, and The best man to ever live!"_

While only A and B ever really talked to L, he knew each of the young orphans' interests, and he had interviewed and evaluated each one of them himself before they came to the orphanage, so all the orphans expected nice surprises, and there was a bit of a buzz going around the orphanage.

_"On the eleventh day of Christmas, Sir Wammy gave to meee~"_

Well, for those that knew about it anyway.

_"Eleven thoughts processing, Ten million dollars, Nine joyful orphans, Eight tests a-testing, Seven minds are blinding, Six rich-man riches, Five genius children, Four calls to justice, Three true successors, Two old men caring, and The best man to ever live!"_

A few of the younger children (a few as in two or three,) still believed in Santa, and no one wanted to burst their tiny little bubbles of naivety, for most of them were old beyond their years anyway. Before long, logic and common sense would bring them to the truth, but for now, kids could be kids.

_"On the twelfth day of Christmas, Sir Wammy gave to meee~"_

B wondered mildly about what he would get. There was nothing really he wanted, except jam, of course, and maybe a knife he'd be allowed to keep, instead of having it have it taken from him all the time... But surely L wouldn't give him a sharp weapon. Because even Beyond admitted that that would be a bad idea, and he smirked to himself silently.

_"Twelve passed assignments, Eleven thoughts processing, Ten million dollars, Nine joyful orphans, Eight tests a-testing, Seven minds are blinding, Six rich-man riches, Five genius children, Four calls to justice, Three true successors, Two old men caring, and The best man to ever live!"_

The children, eager for the next song to begin, turned their modified caroling songbooks to the next page (which featured _Jingle L_ and _L is Coming to Town)_ before they had even reached the last phrase. A mere second later Aislinn began coughing violently at the end of the last verse, the strain of attempting to sing so long without breath too much for her still-frail body to handle. The other children stopped their talking and singing, startled by the outburst. A few of them attempted to gather around A, but Beyond had other ideas.

"Back off!" B practically growled as most of the children gathered around Aislinn. One of them had reached out to touch her but shrank back at B's voice.

Beyond, on his end, stood in front of A, looking panicked with no way to help. Glancing back he saw Roger already on the phone, calling the doctor- Or an ambulance? He hoped that A wasn't in such a bad condition that she had to go the the hospital, but he wanted her to get better fast.

He knelt beside her, blocking the views of most of the other children. Helpless he looked down at her, keeled over and her face red.

"Aislinn, you okay? Snap out of it!"

"I'm... I-I'm fine..." She wheezed.

"Beyond, I think you should go now," said Roger as he shooed the other kids away. B glanced back at A, eyes filled with concern, and saw that she had just spit a few drops of blood onto the carpet.

_No..._

"But-"

"Backup," Roger's tone grew stern, and Beyond winced at the awful name. He had known what 'B' had really stood for for some time now, but it still wasn't... Human. The name didn't seem to be referring to a person.

B glared at Roger for a second, then left the room, going up to his room and lying on his bed. But he wouldn't sleep. He hadn't slept for a week, why start now?

Even as he decided this, though, his eyes closed and he passed into the dream realm.

Near entered the room soon after and glanced at B, expecting him to be glaring back. But he wasn't. He was asleep... Near smiled for the first time in a long time.

**. . .**

Beyond awoke to the sounds of excited squealing and loud shouts from across the orphanage. He blinked groggily, realizing that he had fallen asleep despite his deciding not too.

_"I'm... I-I'm fine..."_

B jumped out of bed, remembering how the night had ended. He raced down the hall and took the stairs two at a time.

_No you're not._

As he ran in the direction of the girls' dorm, Roger intercepted him.

"B," he began in a solemn voice, "Aislinn is in the hospital at the moment."

Beyond's eyes widened, and he was instantly filled with rage.

"Well? ! How is she? ! Can I see her now? ! When can she le-"

"I don't know," said Roger calmly.

Too calmly for Beyond's liking. Didn't he care at all?

He sighed, closing his eyes for a second and taking a deep breath, calming himself.

"May I please go see her?" he said, politely as he could.

Roger nodded. "One of the caregivers has to go pick up a new arrival anyway. He'll drop you off on the way to the airport, and pick you up on the way back, so you won't have long... Assuming traffic isn't bad and the plane isn't late."

Beyond sighed again, assuming it was the best he could get. "When will we leave?"

"In about an hour."

_That's an hour to waste in worry. _"Thank you." Beyond turned, heading back to his room. When he got there he sat on his bed and lifted his pillow, but this time it was not matches that were found thereunder but a small, green box. He stuck it in his pocket, looking up to see his albino roommate staring up at him with round, curious eyes. "Oh, why don't you go check the tree or something?" Beyond growled, and Near looked uncertain. Beyond had been around him enough to know he probably didn't believe in God, even at that age, so Christmas was questionable. But he simply nodded, leaving the room and heading downstairs. B followed.

**. . .**

To be specific, there wasn't _a_ tree, but rather three, in order for all the presents to fit in a five-foot perimeter/fifty percent chance of tripping around the tree.

All of the younger children -again with the addition of Grace- were gathered around the trees, pushing and shoving to get to their gifts, then running to the middle of the room to shred the rapping paper and show off what they got. The older children, with the exception of Grace, were calmly picking through the packages whenever they could without being bitten or having boxes thrown in their faces.

Beyond sat near the outskirts of the room, pretending to show interest when Shell or Tommy or one of the other younger children ran up, showing off their new prized possessions. On the inside, though, his thoughts were split. On one hand he was simply worried for Ash, and on the other he wondered what L had gotten him. He watched as Mello, Jaded, and Matt- who had by now become a trio, though they sometimes hung out with him or Kale- opened their presents. If he hadn't been worried for A still, he might have laughed at how their presents- an drum set for Mello, an electric guitar for Jaded, and an electric bass for Matt- dwarfed them. They'd have to grow into them a bit. Or maybe he'd have smiled or been a little startled by Grace's _slightly_ ecstatic reaction to getting a full nail care set, nail polish included. Or maybe he'd have sneered when Mello knocked down the detailed castle Near was making with his new lego set. Or maybe he'd have attempted (though not necessarily succeeded...) to trip David as he rode his new bike around the room, almost running over several people.

But he didn't.

He couldn't focus on what was going on in the room.

Aislinn was in the hospital. That meant that she was seriously ill. Even worse than before...

"B... Beeeeeee... Beyondddddd... B!"

Beyond was jolted into reality, as Casey was practically screaming his name.

"What? !"

The younger girl shrank back for a second. "T-there's... There's nothing for you or A... Under the trees, I mean."

Beyond was slightly taken back, but then again, what did he care? They were just some stupid presents... And from _L_, nonetheless.

_So, L... The only thing I want besides jam and dangerous objects is... Nothing. Sounds about right. Maybe you know me better than I thought... The question now is if that scares me._

"Wait... did you say that there's nothing for Ash either?"

Casey nodded.

"Hm..." _What are you up to, L?_

**. . .**

The caregiver, Mr. Monroe, nodded quaintly to Beyond as he climbed into the back seat, and the second B had buckled his seatbelt he took off, startling the ravenhead. The young boy cursed him for a second then just gazed out the window. He had no desire for conversation, and it seemed that the driver didn't either. The trip was short but it dragged on quite a bit.

When at last he arrived at the hospital, Beyond got out of the black car quickly. He started to walk off, then turned back around. "Hey, how will I know when it's time to le- ...Aaaaand you're already halfway to the airport..." B sighed, slightly annoyed, and turned back to the building before him. It was huge, and he wondered to himself how it was possible not to get lost in a place like that.

As he walked through the entrance he saw a familiar figure coming toward him at an angle, so that he'd get to the front desk just as B did.

_L. What's he doing here?_

"Hello, B."

"L," Beyond acknowledged and nodded respectively. There was no fatherliness to this 'L' character anymore. Not to him, anyway.

"How did the children like their presents?"

B ignored L for a few seconds to address the clerk. "We're here to see an Ais-"

"Ashlea Wammy," L interrupted.

_An alias for an alias?_

Beyond sighed. He should have known; L was meticulous. No one would ever be able to get medial records from anyone at Wammy's- Other than the last name always being 'Wammy' (to be expected- It was an orphanage, after all,) the alias of even the same person was never the same. Only L had all the records, and maybe the current nurse.

"Well?" L prodded as a nurse lead them down a corridor.

"They seemed to like them. But you realize we'll never have peace now that Mello has a drum set, right?" B said as he attempted to ignore the sterilized smell of the hospital. It annoyed him- not because he didn't like it, but because he wasn't sure if he did. On one hand, it smelled... Perfect. There was no trace of anything. There was just... cleanliness. On the other hand, though, it was perfect. There were no flaws. Beyond wanted to spill blood, to destroy the 'perfectness' that cursed the- _No. That's not... That's not normal. No. What the fuck is wrong with you?_

"He needed a way to vent his anger," L mused, though to most people he would still look and sound as grave and serious as before. But Beyond could tell the difference.

_And how dare he? How dare he make fun when Aislinn was in the hospital, possibly close to death? She might be fine, but... What if she's taken a turn for the worse? After all, yesterday she went from fine to coughing up blood within seconds!_

"It's early, so she may still be asleep..." the nurse began, but L nodded dismissively.

"That's fine."

"Then I'll leave you alone now," she said, a pleasant smile plastered on her face even as she looked at the pair disapprovingly, L especially, and walked away.

The two entered the room and immediately went to either side of Aislinn's hospital bed. She was awake, and she smiled faintly when she saw them. There was a tray of uneaten breakfast food- Eggs, biscuits, and bacon- next to the bed, and she was hooked up to an IV.

"B-Beyond..." Ash whispered hoarsely, and B felt a glint of pride that it was he she had addressed first, not L.

"I got you something." He was smiling; over his earlier mood. He was calm now... Ash seemed to have that affect on him. Especially when her eyes lit up like they did now.

"Be-Be... You r-really didn't ha-" she was cut off by a coughing fit; it was short-lived but her entire body was racked with them.

Putting a hand into his pocket, Beyond pulled out the tiny green box. Ash smiled and took it wordlessly, opening it to reveal a bracelet. It was some sort of black chain, with two pendants. One was 'A' cast in gold and in an Old English font- similar to L's,- the other a 'B' in the same style in silver. It was obviously custom made, and expensive, though money is no matter at the Wammy House. A curiously examined the pendants in awe.

"If you take them like this," B began, gently taking the pendants and moving them closer together until they jumped together, "They'll stick together."

A gasped and grinned. "That's... Genius, B. You truly are a genius."

Beyond shook his head. "Not really. Magnets."

"Genius nonetheless," L intruded, pulling two things from seemingly nowhere, and handing one to B and one to A. "Your Christmas presents."

Beyond decided to wait for A to open hers- a small red box with a bow of a darker shade that nearly dwarfed the box, which was about the size of a box for a ring.

Ash unwrapped the bow carefully and opened the box. "Oh, L, it's wonderful!"

Beyond leaned over to see a white gold 'L' in _his _signature font as Aislinn hooked it onto the bracelet between the 'A' and the 'B.' It, apparently, was also equipped with magnets, for it repelled the two previous symbols to opposite sides of the bracelet.

Anger welled up within Beyond, and it took all he had not to punch L in the face then and there. How dare he? How _dare_ he? !

"B, please open your present." He said it in such a placid tone. As if he didn't know what he had done.

Or as if he did... With L, that could be interpreted as smugness.

_That bastard..._

However, Beyond managed to keep calm as he unfolded the piece of paper he was given. It was addressed to Roger, so he had no idea why it was being given to him. It was short and brief, and he began reading quickly- mostly skimming- until he reached a certain phrase that caught his attention.

_"Student 'B' is now in rank First."_

_First?_

Beyond went back and read more carefully.

_"Dear Mr. Ruvie,_

_It has come to my attention that Student 'A' has become sick to a degree unknown, and may be unfit to succeed me. Due to this, I must ask you to take her out of rank. On the account that she recovers fully and can keep up with the others academically she is to return to her previous place, but until then, Student 'B' is now in rank First._

_-L."_

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><p><strong>AN: YAYYY BIPOLAR CHAPPIE :D**

**And, ****people, if you read, please review xDx 58 hits and 49 visitors (_WHAT_ the _FUCK_ is a hit? XDDDX I thought it was like a 'like' or something but... WTF XDX is it when it comes up on a search or what?) and only 3 reviews D: it makes meh sad D: ...& none of those reviews addressed the questions I had put in the A/N... FEEDBACK, PPL! xDx But seriously, reviews make me feel fuzzy inside :3 ...Which is actually really cool, because if I'm wearing my robe or fluffy pajamas, I'm fuzzy on the outside too! C:**

**SHAMELESS SELF PIMPAGE: Like crackfics? Check out TheTawnyColoredAbyssOfDoom, my friend Tawnyshine and me's joint account!**


	14. Ch 13, Outline of a Monster

**A/N: Happy Holidays to everyone! *cough* I should be updating my How To Annoy DN Characters fic... But... I felt like writing this. I've been bad about that lately. XDX**

**Sorry for L being a meanie pants in this chapter and last and maybe next... THERE IS A REASON I SWEAR D: **

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><p><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: TWO MONTHS 11 DAYS - DECEMBER 25TH, 1997<strong>

* * *

><p><em>First... First... First...<em> Beyond read the letter once more before taking a second to let the contents of the letter sink in. _No, that title is Aislinn's! She will be fine, and she will get better! There's no 'if'- It's when! She will get better, she has to!_

When Beyond looked at her, Aislinn looked worried, and he realized that his thoughts must be showing on his face.

"W-well... What does it say?"

Beyond sighed and handed it to her carefully. He wasn't sure what this would do to her...

**. . .**

Ash's face grew grave, and a tear rolled down her cheek, but she wiped it off with her hand and put on a brave face._ I knew this was coming. My grades have been slipping- no, not just slipping, plummeting... This would have happened some time or another, even if I wasn't sick... I'm not worthy of being number one. I never was. I never should have been chosen to even come to Wammy's! I'm not good enough! Never was, never will be!_

She turned to L and handed the letter back to him, swallowing the lump in her throat.

L, however, only handed it back to Beyond, who had come around the bed to L's side so he could see her better. "I'd like you to deliver this for me."

Aislinn watched as Beyond's eyes widened then narrowed with fury. She knew Beyond. She knew what he was about to do, and as he drew his fist back she jumped out of bed and between the two. Beyond looked surprised, but lowered his fist.

"B... Please don't. Please, _please _don't. It's okay. I really don't mind. You deserve to be first, and you should deliver the message with your head held high." A tried to smile- it was hard, but she did it for Beyond.

B studied her face for a second before sighing, and A's smile widened. It would be okay.

** . . .**

Beyond left Ash's room soon afterward and chastised himself. He couldn't lose control like that again. He couldn't.

Beside him, L walked with his thumb tracing the edge of his lower lip, his eyes often slipping to the younger boy next to him. They left through the front entrance, but before they went any farther L stopped and put his hand on B's shoulder, stopping and turning him around to face him. He attempted to look the boy in the eye, but B looked away to the side.

"You're forgiven."

Beyond suddenly directed his gaze on L and met his eyes, his own harsh with a fire that by now seemed inextinguishable. B wanted to yell at L, to yell and scream and accuse him of so many things, but he was already walking away, heading for his car, leaving B's anger no outlet; no option but to fester and grow until it boiled over.

I'm _forgiven? _I _am? What is it I've done, compared to you! ? Me, me who's only trying to help A, and you, who seem to be trying to make her sicker! And then you rub it in my face and hers, and you come between us like that stupid charm you gave her! That was _my _present! Mine! And look at what you did! You... You monster!_

** . . .**

The ride home seemed forever long. The 'newcomer' was in fact a girl with light auburn hair pulled into a messy pony tail. She was about Grace's age, and she was overwhelmingly kind, even to those who didn't want her kindness. She tried to introduce herself, but Beyond snapped at her before she could. Even though Beyond could see that her name was Eerika Adele, if she ran around telling everyone her name, she'd never make it a day as L.

After that B just watched out the window, determined to keep his thoughts on the passing landscape. He didn't _want _to explode, but he knew that at some point he would.

By the time they had gotten back to Wammy's, Beyond had cooled down a bit, and he turned to the girl, Eerika, to apologize. Before he could, however, he noticed what she was holding. It was a notebook and a packet of colored pencils. On the open page of the notebook was a picture of himself in almost perfect likeness. He was looking out the window, and his hair was shielding the viewer from seeing his eyes, but in his reflection the looked like they were on fire; his expression furious but placid at the same time. Through the reflection a blurry background could be seen- it looked like rolling hills with a few trees and maybe some sheep dotting the landscape.

Beyond was stunned for several moments. It was only in colored pencil, but it was amazing. "That's, um..." he tried to think of a word to bridge the gap between them as the girl looked up at him expectantly. "That's really good."

"Thanks!" She was grinning, and it was plain to see that she had no grudge against B for his earlier outburst.

"You can call me Beyond, or B."

"Um... Well... I guess I'll be... Linda. My name is Linda."


	15. Ch 14, Stand Resolute

**A/N: I told you L was being a meaniepantz. T.T Sorry this chapter is so short! This & the next chapter are kinda like transition chapters. Because soon... THERE WILL BE ANGSTTTTTTT.**

**Woah, I haven't done a disclaimer in a long while.**

**'ǝʇou ɥʇɐǝp uʍo ʇ,uop ı**

**C:**

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><p><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: TWO MONTHS 11 DAYS - DECEMBER 25, 1997  TWO MONTHS 4 DAYS - JANUARY 1, 1998**

* * *

><p><em>Interesting...<em> L thought to himself on the way back to his current residence; an expensive hotel in London. _You didn't react quite like I suspected. I thought you'd snap much earlier, and that when you did it'd be a bit more violent... Either I've overestimated how much you care, or you're good at keeping face. When Aislinn got involved, though... You calmed down. I wonder. I wonder what you would have done if I had stayed but a moment longer... In any case; well done, Beyond. You pass, if even just barely._

_**. . .**_

Beyond looked down at the letter in his hands. He sighed before knocking on Roger's door. There was an instant reply of _'come in'_ and he opened the natural stained oak door slowly, wincing as it creaked loudly.

"A message... From L," B said as he tossed the sealed envelope onto the old caretaker's desk. There was a minute of silence as Roger opened and read the letter. The elder then looked up at B.

"Have you read this?"

Beyond nodded. "So has A."

Roger nodded and reread the letter. "And how is she doing?"

"She can stand." B said, offering nothing else.

Roger rubbed his temple with his right hand, the letter still in his left. "Very well... Return to your classes. And send the new student in, will you?"

B nodded and turned towards the door. As he left he turned to the new girl, Linda, and gestured for her to go in. She smiled at him, but he couldn't do the same.

**. . .**

Beyond looked out the window at the moon. It wasn't quite full, but the full moon had been just a few days ago, so only a slight shadow could be seen around the edges of the lunar circle. The other children were downstairs in the common room celebrating the arrival of the new year as the old grandfather clock tolled the midnight time. They were all happy and joyful but at the same time sad, for the next day their school days would be full again, instead of having half the day off as they had for the holiday break, and their classes would no longer be about religious customs around the world, which was a whole heck of a lot more interesting than their usual curriculum. B, however, was not celebrating, nor happy, nor annoyed or sad at the return to the full school days, for it had been almost a week, and Aislinn had not yet been released from the hospital. And furthermore, Beyond had not been permitted to see her. And it was the New Year.

Every year on New Year's Eve, he and A had celebrated their own way, and for a while L had done with with them. Before he had gotten so much busier. Before Beyond had grown to hate him. If he was honest, Beyond would say that he smiled upon the memories. He'd smile at the cake A'd help the cooks to make, he'd smile about how no one could eat it, he'd smile at A's embarrassment. He'd smile at the confetti and party trumpets and the exchanging of small gifts between him an A and the sharing of their New Year's Resolutions. But this year there was no smiling, because A was always sick, B was number one, and A wasn't there.

And Beyond's only wish was for her to get better, his only resolution for him to be able to help.


	16. Ch 15, Facets of Jade, Cuts of Ash

**A/N: Jeez, I am so itching to write BB going super demented & shit. (He's only 4 types of crazy now... and demented is 7 or above. =:]) We're almost there! Might actually take a few more chapters than I said because of something Tawnyshine came up with... THANKS BUDDEH :3**

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><p><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: 28 DAYS - February 13, 1998<strong>

* * *

><p><em>~<br>Tell me what you know!  
>Tell me what you gone and done now!<br>Gonna do the trick  
>Get it over with!<br>~_

Beyond was troubled. That much was easy enough to see. Aislinn's death date was fast approaching and he could tell that she was going downhill fast. She had been released from the hospital just a week before and she seemed to be better, happier, healthier... But she wasn't herself. It was like she was faking it, like she was hiding something. He wasn't sure anyone else could see it though, so he said nothing.

But then again, who knew her better than he did? And who to be better to see when someone was hiding something than someone who kept so many secrets? _'Takes one to know one'_ is how the saying goes, right?

But everyone has secrets. Surely it's nothing.

...Right?

**. . .**

Ash looked down at her bleeding arm. It was shaking, along with the hand holding the blade.

"No, you're doing it wrong!"

She looked up at the redhead, her lip quivering. She felt like she was Atlas, felt like she had been holding the world up, and she had finally let go. It felt good, but it felt... Wrong. So very wrong. All the blood of those people and animals that would die if he were to let go, even for a second, was streaming down her arm, pooling in the palm of her hand...

"You gotta do it vertically! They can't stitch that up."

Slowly, carefully, A did as the younger girl said, feeling the adrenaline and the endorphines take over in her brain and making her numb as the blade split her skin and formed a cross when paired with the first cut. But it was _wrong._

"I... I'm not sure I ca-"

"Shut up. You asked about how to do it, and I'm telling you how."

Jaded was leaning against the wall, hands crossed over her chest and one leg braced against the wall. She had had a sudden growth-spurt over the last week or two and was now almost as tall as Ash. She had an indifferent look on her face as she looked ahead, and A thought back to what had happened, _how_ this had happened... How it had come to this.

She had been doped up on her daily dosage of pain relievers and other medication and really had no control over what she said. Jaded had happened to be visiting when she had spilled it,_everything, _being incapable of lying or concealing the truth. All her thoughts she had poured upon the younger girl, and as she did so she had come around.

**. . .**

_"I think I know something that could help you," the redhead said, for once her tone soft with understanding._

_"W-W... Wh-at?"_

_Jaded looked around for a second before motioning to A. "You're done now, you can come to me and Grace's room. I can tell you there."_

_"But... If it's something you don't want to say here... What if Grace is there?"_

_The younger girl smirked. "I can run her out. Just trust me."_

_And so the two had gone to the pair of opposite's room, and, in fact, Grace was not present. Jaded ushered Ash inside and over to her bed, which from under she pulled out a box cutter. Ash stared at it with wide eyes._

_"You... You don't mean...?"_

_The redhead nodded. "It's your choice. I can't make you do it, but it's an option, and there are those that say it helps."_

**. . .**

_Those that say it helps? She didn't include herself in that statement..._

"J-...Jaded?"

"Yeah?"

"Have... Have you ever done this before?" Ash's hand shook as she made another small incision, but she put the box cutter down and used the hand to clutch the wound instead of continuing it up her arm.

"Once. The night my parents died."

"But... how did you know what to do? You're... you're six. You're just a kid!" Suddenly her own pain was forgotten and she only wanted to know that of Jaded's. What could cause a kid her age to want to do this? Sure, she was an orphan, but... _Why?_ It was awful.

Jaded shrugged. "My mother. When she wasn't drunk, she was cutting. Once, when she was both drunk and slitting her wrists, she told me to come to her, to listen carefully. She sounded so motherly, which was uncommon, so naturally I thought it a one time opportunity and went to her. But if I think about it, it was probably the worst thing she ever said to me. _'Now, remember Honey;'"_ Jaded used a mocking tone to quote her mother,_ "'Down the road, not across the street! This'll make you feel better, and if you do it right they can't stitch it up. Just remember it, Honey.'_And then, a while later, they died, so I did as she said. And now I'm here, and I haven't cut since. It did nothing for me at the time, but I figured I'd keep something around, just in case I ever felt the need to try again. Cutting, however much it's frowned upon, is better than suicide."

Aislinn sat there in silence with blood running down her arm. She wanted to cry- for Jaded, for herself, for anyone who felt like this was the only solution- but no tears came to her eyes. She wondered if she'd adopted the same expression Jaded had on at the moment- Stony, but not unaware. Heartless, but not cruel. Understanding, but not sympathetic.

She was jaded indeed.

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><p><strong>AN: LOLWHUT? Jaded is actually semi-important to the plot? HAHAYEAHZ!**

**.**

**. .**

**. . .**

**Okay, I didn't expect it either. Happy? xD**


	17. Ch 16, Saints, Demons, One in the Same

**A/N: Fucking SOPA/PIPA. I can't watch ANYTHING now. Hetalia, Hellsing, Code Geass, Wolf's Rain, Vampire Knight, Kuroshitsuji, the list goes on & on... PLUS shit that's not anime, AHND MAH MUSIC DX And then there's ACTA... Netflix is my only hope. ;A; I've signed all the petitions IK of, but if you guys find more, lemme know. 'Cause I am PISSED. t.t**

**;A; this chapter is so short! I sowweys! D:**

**hehe, 28 Days.**

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><p><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: 28 DAYS - February 13, 1998<strong>

* * *

><p>Jaded stared at the wall in front of her, refusing to let the memories take her. Instead she let her mind drift to just the day before, wondering if this was right.<p>

No. Not whether or not it was right... Fuck being right. She wondered about whether or not it would work... And if she could continue with the plan.

**. . .**

_"Can't he see that she's going to die? !"_

_"Calm down, Jaded! He's her friend!"_

_"I just don't see the point in trying so hard for something that's already lost. The more you care about something, the harder it is when it leaves. And eventually, everything; everyone, leaves."_

_"That doesn't justify an intervention."_

_"Look, okay! If she dies after he's been spending so much time with her, he'll die inside! That or go crazy! He's a friend; I don't want that to happen..."_

_"Well there's nothing we can do about it, so just let it rest."_

_"I can't just 'let it rest'! He _loves_ her, how can you not see that? When she dies..."_

_"...He loves her?..."_

_"Are you all blind?"_

_"Well, now that I think about it..."_

_"Exactly. And once she's dead, if he still carries the affection... Look, I think I know Beyond. I think you do too. I can't be sure, but that's what I think. And by what I think, I think that he'll either go cold or snap. Neither are favorable, and neither lead to anything in his future. I mean, I like her too; I even consider her a friend. But we have to do_ something_, don't we?"_

_"Well... I see your point. But I don't think there's anything we can do."_

_"We can make him hate her."_

_"Wh... What?"_

_"You heard me."_

_"B-but that's..."_

_"Saving his sanity."_

_"...No, Jaded. I'm sorry. I, we... We can't do that to them. You said it yourself; he honestly, truly loves her. You're on your own."_

**. . .**

"Fine, then..." Jaded growled under her breath, "I'll do it myself."

"Huh?" Aislinn looked up at the redhead in confusion.

"Nothing. Just... Clean up when you're done. Take the blade with you."

Ash nodded slowly, her gaze cast down to her still-bleeding arm.

"Um... Thank you, I guess," she said quietly.

_You idiot... This is nothing to thank me for._


	18. Ch 17, Questions and Secrets

**A/N: ****Sorry this chapter is so short! I suppose I could have added what will be the next chapter in here, but... Eh. I like it like this. [No I don't I'm just tired and avoiding overdue schoolwork at 1 AM *shot*]**

**Thanks for helping me with this, Tawny :3**

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><p><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: 22 DAYS - February 19, 1998<strong>

* * *

><p>Grace skipped down the hall toward Casey and Aislinn's dorm room, her usual over-joyful self. She knew that Aislinn had just gotten back to her room from her daily medicating, so she figured she'd go see her. Without knocking, she threw the door open.<p>

"Hey Ash! I was just wondering if..."

Grace trailed off when she saw what A was doing.

"A... Ash?"

A had frozen still as she heard the door opening, knife in hand and blood on her wrists. She was hunched over on a stool, and her breathing wasn't labored, but it was loud and shallow- shaky, even. The dark blood contrasted with her arm wildly, as it was even more pale than usual. There were a few towels under her arm to catch her blood, all of them bright colored, as if to lighten the mood. The young girl looked tired and weary, and she didn't even seem to notice that the tips of her jet black hair had been died red by a coating of blood.

"Wh-what are you d-doing?"

"Grace... You... Grace, don't tell.. anyone, you can't tell... Especially not... not Beyond, oh God, not Beyond..." she seemed breathless, as if she had just run a marathon... or bled out all her energy. "Please, Grace, oh, please... He worries too much about me... Just don't... you can't... just..." she seemed unable to form words, so instead resorted to shaking her head tiredly, yet fervently.

The blonde just stood there for a second, eyes wide open with shock. "I... I w-won't tell..."

The ravenhead stood, the towels and blade falling to the floor, and ran over to Grace, taking hold of her upper arms desperately. "You have to promise me, Grace! Swear!"

"I... I promise I won't tell anyone."

Aislinn nodded before turning back to her mess and bending down to pick up the towels that had fallen to the floor. Hiding her blade under her matress, she turned back to Grace who stood in the doorway, watching her, the blond's mind still not fully registering what was happening. Even as Ash stood there looking apologetic (more than likely for what she just put Grace through,) and rubbing her upper arm self-consciously, her bloodstained hand moistening her shirt once more, Grace could only feel confusion.

She conjured up a question to describe her shock. "...Why?"

Aislinn met her shocked gaze for a second, then looked away. "It's... Nothing."

"Obviously it's not! If it was nothing, you wouldn't be sli-"

Aislinn cut her off. "I... I don't know how to... explain it, not properly, okay?"

"What do you mea-"

Aislinn cringed. "Please, be more careful! You're shouting!" tears threatened to attack and betray the raven headed girl.

"...Right..." Grace turned slowly towards the door, still shocked.

For once, the blonde wasn't happy or chattering, but instead solemn with silence. Her question echoed loudly in her head;

_Why? What could drive her to do this?_


	19. Ch 18, Delightful Future Prospects

**A/N: Derppp...**

**School is so hectic now, I never get time to write D: & the weird thing is we do NOTHING at school but they give us like 4587346543 homeworks D: And then it's just like... FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUU-**

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><p><strong><strong>TIME UNTIL AISLINN'S DEATH DATE: 14 DAYS - February 28, 1998<strong>  
><strong>

* * *

><p>Grace lay in her bed, facing the wall. She hadn't been able to shake Ash's... predicament... from her mind since she had found out. It had been eating her up. She wasn't sure what to do, and now she had become completely depressed, locking herself in her room whenever possible. Jaded never said anything, but Grace knew she noticed. Everyone noticed. She was being almost the exact opposite of herself, and it just... It didn't feel right, but what else could she do? They were always there in her mind, the questions...<p>

_Why would she do this?_

_What could I have done to stop it before it happened?_

_What will she do now?_

And most of all...

_Do I tell?_

The last one was so much more pressing, because it was so much more relevant. Why didn't matter now, she couldn't go back, and what to do now was too broad a question. But if she told... That could mean everything. To so many people. Ash, Beyond, Roger, Mello, Matt, Jaded, herself... L.

What if she did?

Aislinn would hate her forever, certainly. Beyond might be angry, but he'd try to help best he could. Roger'd probably go overboard trying to help; there'd be dozens of therapist visits... that or he'd just give up immediately and set L on it. Mello wouldn't understand... Matt might, though, and maybe Jaded. All three would be angry, and worried, probably. Grace herself would question what would have happened if she'd taken the other path... And L? L... would give up on Ash? Try to save her? Send her spiraling farther into a depression?

Really, what would L do?

Grace adored him; she really did, but...

She had questions about the man.

She wasn't as dumb as she seemed.

She was a genius, after all. One of the world's finest!

In fact, she was sure she noticed more than most.

And one of the things that she noticed was that L had questionable motives and morals...

So what would L do? She honestly didn't know. Surely he wasn't so sick as to mess with A's mind for the sake of his own experimentation, right?

But what if she said nothing?

Aislinn might get worse... More and more depressed, maybe even kill herself! And Beyond... He'd snap. He was deeply in love with Aislinn, more than just a childish crush... It was obvious. What would he do? Hurt others? _Hurt himself?_ What if they _both_ committed? Roger would feel guilty for not noticing... Mello and the rest of his trio would be angry, hurt... Sad? It seemed so odd to think of any of the three as being _sad._ But what if that loss drove one or all of them over the edge too? And if one of them killed themselves, wouldn't they all? _And if any that happened, I'd spiral myself... _L would lose so many of his successors..._ He'd feel it then. It's too much for him not too, even if he is a little cold._

Well it was settled then, wasn't it?

_So what if everyone is angry with me?_

_I have to tell._

_But... _Who _can I tell?_


End file.
